What a first week to the NFL season! Baltimore stuns Pittsburgh, Buffalo puts up 41 points, Brady passes for 517 yds, Green Bay & New Orleans open the season in style, Cam Newton’s impressive debut for openers …. Outside of just a couple of games, where is the defense??? I don’t know if it’s because of the lockout or because of continued rule changes but seems like every game is a shootout… not sure if defensive coordinators like it, but it makes for good TV.
Rank/Team/W-L/Last Wk
FILET MIGNON DIVISION
1.Packers 1-0 (1) Is there a better receiver corps than Green Bay’s? Or QB for that matter? They picked up where they left off.
2.Ravens 1-0 (5) It doesn’t get any better for Ravens fans than to put a beat-down on your nemesis on opening day….
3.Jets 1-0 (3) Almost an embarrassing loss on 9-11 in NY, but the Cowboys are who we THOUGHT they were!!! BTW, which Ryan twin is uglier?
4.Steelers 1-0 (4) Don’t worry about these guys, they’ll be alright. It was probably the reality check they needed. And gives Omar Epps some ammo to give motivational speeches…
5.Saints 1-0 (7) No shame in losing a squeaker at the buzzer against the defending champs in their place on opening night…
6.Patriots 1-0 (4) Ball-wash Brady all you want, but this new and improved D may be new, but it certainly isn’t improved…..
7.Eagles 1-0 (8) The Dream Team got it done in St. Louie…let the S.S. Hype sail on….
8.Texans 1-0 (9) Lets not put this team in the Super Bowl just yet, the Colts aren’t the Colts without Manning.
9.Bears 1-0 (14) Was it the Bears or was it Atlanta laying a gigantic egg?
10.Chargers 1-0 (11) San Diego’s not-so-special teams was on full display on the opening kickoff…. way to get that corrected Norv….
11.Falcons 0-1 (6) Gave their fans the proverbial turd-in-the-punchbowl present for opening day…
CHOPPED SIRLOIN DIVISION
12.Lions 1-0 (15) Did this win feel as good as their preseason win against NE? Just asking….
13.Bucs 0-1 (10) We’ll soon find out if last year was fools gold with this team.
14.Cowboys 0-1 (16) Wow, does it suck to be a Dallas fan or what? All I know is Tony Romo is a better golfer than NFL quarterback.
15.Colts 0-1 (9) Now that the head coach, err star QB, is out for the year, what will they do now? Seriously people, this head coach of theirs (bonus points if you can name him) is way over his head.
16.Raiders 1-0 (18) If this team only had a QB, they would be dangerous…
17.Redskins 1-0 (26) Wow, I know you were thinking like I did: the Giants must really suck….
18.Chiefs 0-1 (12) What the hell was THAT??? Memo to Pioli & Haley: The preseason is over.
19.Cardinals 1-0 (21) Did you see those corn Kolb hats with “Kevin” on them?? Classic!!
20.Giants 0-1 (13) Quickly becoming an after-thought in the Greater NY area…well, at least nationally…
21.Rams 0-1 (19) Instead of making a statement, they got Steven Jackson and Sam Bradford hurt…not good.
22.Vikings 0-1 (20) They need to buy a brand new QB instead of always shopping at the second-hand store.
23.Dolphins 0-1 (22) How can Miami’s players be more fatigued in humid weather than a NE team? ..and can’t Sparano’s friends and family tell him he looks like a clown with sunglasses on at night??
24.Niners 1-0 (28) Stanford beat So. Cal for its first win of the year…these are not NFL teams.
25.Bills 1-0 (31) WOW, I mean WOW!! Who saw that coming? You can’t stop Buffalo, you can only hope to contain them.
TUBE STEAK DIVISION
26.Jags 1-0 (29) If a tree falls in the forest, does anyone hear it?
27.Panthers 0-1 (25) Looks like Carolina has a QB ladies and gents… of course, Panther fans have never really seen a good one.
28.Seahawks 0-1 (23) Repeat after me, Pete Carroll cannot coach in the NFL…of course, NE & Jets fans already knew this…
29.Bengals 1-0 (32) Bonus points to anyone who can name more than 2 Bengals….how about more than 1?
30.Broncos 0-1 (27) Believe me, it won’t be long before Bronco fans are wishing they still had McDaniels….they have no clue how terrible Fox is….all of Charlotte is chuckling….
31.Titans 0-1 (24) Nashville…a good drinking town with a football problem…
32.Browns 0-1 (30) Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you the Mike Holmgren era…
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